Sunday, April 28, 2013

He Dumped Me--How Do I Get Over It

Everyone hopes that their relationships will stand the test of time.  Unfortunately, though, many relationships fail--and most of us end up dealing with more than a few broken hearts during our lifetimes.  It's tough enough when a breakup happens as a mutual decision; however, when a guy dumps you, that can make it even more difficult to handle.

If he dumped you and you need some help in getting over the loss, read the following suggestions and give them a try.  They will help you to live through the stormy days following the breakup and come out on the other side feeling ready to move on.

1.  Go ahead and grieve.

While it may sound melodramatic to 'grieve' over a breakup, you have experienced a deep loss.  Therefore, you need to grieve and get those emotions out.  For the first few days it is ok to cry and mope around and feel sorry about what you have lost.  Get support from close friends if needed, but do NOT contact your ex.  You need to let go of the relationship, act as if it is buried and gone.

2.  Get rid of any evidence of your ex.

Go through all of your belongings and get rid of everything that reminds you of the breakup.  Put away all photos of him and any gifts he gave you.  As for what to do with them, it depends.  You may want to pack up photos as possible mementos for years later.  With gifts, you may want to pack them up, sell them, give them away, or donate them.  It is completely your decision as to what to do; however, be sure to get everything out of your sight.

Don't forget to change or remove any of your ex's playlists on your iPod or MP3 player.  Change your telephone ringtones if necessary as well.  Eliminate all traces of him from your life so that there will be nothing to remind you of him on a daily basis.

3.  Make a list of what irked you about your ex.

Yes, right now you are still missing him because he dumped you; however, take a few moments and think about how your relationship really was.  There had to be some habits or quirks about your boyfriend that you found to be exasperating.  Write these down--as many as you can.  Think about everything, from big issues (maybe he refused to stop talking on his cell while driving, even though you considered this to be dangerous) to the little concerns (perhaps he often spilled sugar on the counter when making his morning coffee and never wiped it up).

The point of making this list is to show you that your relationship was not perfect and that your ex is not worthy of being worshipped.  In addition, you may just see that there were troubles in the relationship...and that perhaps a part of you already realized that you two weren't the ideal couple.

Maybe he dumped you--but you will survive and find a way to move on if you follow these suggestions.  

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